I think that one of the reasons why we never seem to find true and lasting solutions is because we don’t really want to know what the problem is. For example, a person may have a problem with drinking that they want to get over. They focus exclusively on trying to stay away from bars and enlist the help of accountability partners to work through their temptation to drink. They find themselves slipping back into the same patterns over and over thus concluding that the problem is too difficult to solve. What they don’t focus on is why they want to drink. Perhaps they would begin to move closer to the root of the problem. They may find that they want to drink so bad because they are trying to escape. If they realize that they are trying to escape then they may be able to find out what they are trying to escape from. This is how issues are handled.

Someone else is trying to figure out how to budget better. They try all different kinds of spreadsheets and programs but they never seem to get any victory. They begin to conclude that they just don’t have the discipline to budget well. They surmise that those who do budget well were just given some gift that they simply missed out on. What that same person doesn’t want to know however, is why they spend money. Maybe they spend money to protect the persona that they are trying to project for the sake of the opinions of others. They want people to think that they have money so that people will think well of them. Why does this person care so much about others thinking well of them? Maybe if we can figure that out, we can figure out the root of the money problems.

You need to be willing to call a spade a spade. We are always trying to solve the cosmetic issues because we’re too scared or lazy to uproot the core issue behind the little issues we are trying to solve. Freedom is found beneath the surface. In order to function at that level you must develop a raw appreciation for the truth. There can be no sugar-coating and no beating around the bush. What is the fundamental truth and what are you going to do about it? This has to be a question that drives you. You may find answers that are uncomfortable but at least you will begin to make true and lasting progress. Don’t settle for easy answers and when you see a spade, have the courage to call it a spade.