If relationships are anything, they’re messy. We can say all day long that we’re not going to let anything get to us but that would mean we’re not going to be around people. People are going to do things that will get under your skin and even downright offend you. I think we can grow in this respect but it’s probably always going to happen at least to some degree. Edwards’ 14th resolution was…

Resolved, Never to do any thing out of revenge.

Notice that he didn’t say that he would never feel offended or be tempted to take revenge on someone. Some of us live our lives so closed off from others that we don’t allow anything to get to us. This isn’t God’s design for us. God has designed up to be in relationship which means we are to live our lives in close proximity to others. Then there are those who live on the other side of spectrum and seem to be so interconnected with others that they have no identity of their own. They always seem to have drama following them and that’s not healthy either. 

We are to have individual identities but also live closely connected to those around us. This means conflict on at least a semi-regular basis because we understand that people are not perfect. We will get hurt. We will probably be offended from time to time but we can choose not to take revenge. Romans 12:19 says, “Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.” Clearly revenge is not our responsibility and we must trust God to bring about ultimate justice. Our job is to love God with everything we have and others in the same way.