I’m working through Proverbs and Proverbs 10:5 says…

He who gathers crops in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son.

When I read this Proverb, I think of my sons and what they’ll be like when they’re older. I hope they have a great work ethic and aren’t lazy like the disgraceful son described in this passage. The tricky thing about disciplining your kids is that you have to have a vision as to what you’re disciplining them to become. What kind of person do you want him or her to be?

Probably all of us would agree on certain points and then it gets a little more tricky. It’s common that we don’t want our kids to lie, cheat, steal, kill or otherwise hurt other people. We also all probably want our kids to tell the truth and to be kind to others. We all, most likely, want them to achieve big things and to never settle for the status quo. As the list goes on and on however, things get a little more hazy. We don’t want to force our kids into a preconceived image that we’ve created but we also can’t be too laissez faire about their growth because then we’re not really parenting them.

It’s up to Abbi and I to prayerfully consider what the values of our family are and then discipline towards that ideal to the best of our ability. Those values must allow all the necessary room for Isaac and Jonathan to become the men that they were created to be. That being said, it is our responsibility as their parents to decide what is and what is not acceptable based on our deepest values and beliefs. Deciding on what those values and beliefs are is difficult work when done correctly. Most people try to build the proverbial plane while it’s flying when it comes to this type of thing but that is not terribly wise. To be sure, there is no such thing as figuring all this out before you have kids but these are conversations you have to dive into head first. Most people avoid establishing values in life and avoid conversations regarding beliefs. Those conversations force you into questions that are not easily answered and this is where your life philosophy becomes intensely relevant. 

Do you want a full and meaningful life? If you do, then you have no choice but to engage in those difficult conversations. If you’re content just to experience a measure of happiness and die then perhaps you can avoid conversations like these. We all have to decide which path we’ll choose.